Journalism Final

Casey Holmes

Journalism F

January 22, 2014

Teenagers these days are considered lazy, self-absorbed, and rebellious. Teenagers do not have a good reputation because they are always on social media and rush to do their homework. Some people think that these traits are just a part of growing up while other people think it will contribute to how they act when they are an adult. Adolescents have a different perspective on other teenagers than adults and have very outspoken minds. I asked lots of teenagers, “Do you think that other teenager girls are self-absorbed?”

Deb said, "I don't think all teenage girls are; I mean some of them are self-absorbed. They take selfies, that's the first part of self-absorbed is "self". All the posting to Instagram and Snapchat seems a bit much." She later went on to explain that all the teenagers do is take pictures of themselves in the best light to get the most likes, reblogs, or retweets. It gives them self-confidence but a selfie every day is a little too much, and very annoying. This makes teenagers self-centered since they're always trying to make themselves look cool or pretty to society’s standards and not they're own true intentions.

Molly from the freshman class says that  “A lot of teenage girls are self-absorbed today simply because everyone else is so determined to make their hair and makeup look perfect every single day, which in turn makes other girls become obsessed with their own self-image and how they view themselves." Deb and Molly are in tune thinking that society makes girls think that they need to be pretty or get a lot of likes to be popular or on top. Sadly, it's a never ending cycle that each generation has to deal with but in completely different ways. "Unlike the egocentrism of preschoolers which is based on concrete problems," says Dr. Paul Schwartz ," Adolescent egocentrism concerns more abstract thoughts and ideas." He is saying that teenagers only do what they think is cool based on what everyone else thinks is cool, but might not be what is actually cool. This theory is complex in its own matter, confusing the adolescent brain to become so insecure about her flaws that she becomes so self-absorbed to make herself on top of the pyramid. This self-absorption therefore causes jealousy of who has the newest item, who goes to the most parties, who has the best grades, or even who has the coolest clique. "Girls are judgmental because they look for the flaws in other girls that they find in themselves. When they judge other girls in reality judging themselves, at least in part," states Molly a freshman at Norton High School. This jealousy causes cliques to fall apart at the seams or make them stronger because they judge everyone including their friends all the time and together. Judging and gossiping is a "fun" and easy way to pass time when all you can do is tweet something and text all your friends at any time of the day you wish. In return, talking to people too much causes you to become jealous of what they have and not be only happy with what you have in your life. Nancy said, "The only reason people judge other people is because it's cool to hate everything that is thrown at you. I think it's quite cool to find someone who doesn't hammer down on you just because you don't feel the need to know all the gossip and to talk about boys and people’s enemies." Even though it is okay to not like certain things, everyone thinks that it is exceptionally cool to think differently than everyone else, but in thinking differently just like everyone else that’s what makes us the same.

 “I think girls just put up a fake wall to make themselves seem more outgoing than they actually are so more people will like them. All the girls that post selfie after selfie are just looking for people's approval. It's all about how many likes they get because they constantly need to know what people think. And girls judge each other because they just want to make themselves feel good. Girls have their own hierarchy. The cool girls on top have to judge the girls in the bottom so they stay on top and the girls on the bottom judge the girls on top because they are bitter about being on the bottom. If girls weren't constantly worried about what other people think of them they wouldn't be judgmental or self-centered,” stated Jacey Anderson. All of these people can come to agree that teenagers are self-absorbed because of what they think that people think about them, they are insecure, and want to be approved in the eyes of society.

 

 

In return, ‘ "We are getting a lot more calls these days from kids who are really interested in volunteering," said Celine Fortin associate executive director of ARC of New Jersey, an advocacy group for people with developmental disabilities,’ shows that many teenagers do care about having an impact on their community. Even though community service does look good on college applications and is required for certain high schools this is an overwhelming amount of adolescents looking to serve their community.  This shows that people aren’t constantly caring about themselves, they want to help out people with disabilities or people that are less fortunate. "The only time they're not self-centered is when they're playing a sport," Jacob continued," with younger kids, and are especially good with special needs children." He said this because he feels as though teenagers want to set a good example for other people but can't maintain their consistency. They want to impress people to show that it's not only about them, and once in a while they can take the time to not be constantly thinking about themselves. "She learned that that it's not so much what teens are thinking — it's how." Stated Richard Knox.  Even though some people, including journalists and news reporters may want to blame the parents for how their children's behavior, it's ultimately up to the adolescent. Six out of the seven people that I interviewed completely thought that teenagers are self-absorbed. It's how they think about thinking, how they think society sees them, they feel the need to impress people since they are insecure, it’s just a phase that most teenagers go through, the phase of self-absorption.

 

 

 

 

 

MLA Format

 

Knox, Richard. "The Teen Brain: It's Just Not Grown Up Yet." NPR. N.p., 1 Mar. 2010. Web. 10 Jan. 2014.  (MLA Format For npr.org)

Schwartz, Paul. "HudsonValleyParent." Teens Becoming Self-centered. N.p., 10 Nov. 2013. Web. 15 Jan. 2014.

Yellin, Deena. "Teens Self-absorbed? Think Again. Youth Volunteers Fill Service Gaps." The Record. N.p., 10 Mar. 2010. Web. 16 Jan. 2014.

ROUGH DRAFT

Teenagers these days are considered lazy, self-absorbed, and rebellious. Teenagers do not have a good reputation since they are always on social media and rush to do their homework. Some people think that these traits are just a part of growing up while other people think it will contribute to how they act when they’re an adult. Teenagers have a different perspective on other teenagers than adults and have very outspoken minds. I asked lots of teenagers, “Do you think that other teenager are self-absorbed?”

Self-absorption is when you are preoccupied with one’s own thought, emotion, and life.

Deb said, "I don't think all teenage girls are, I mean some of them are self-absorbed. They take selfies, that's the first part if self-absorbed is "self". All the posting to Instagram and Snapchat seems a bit much." She later went on to explain that all the teenagers do is take pictures of themselves in the best light to get the most likes, reblogs, or retweets. It gives them self-confidence but a selfie every day is a little too much, and very annoying. This makes teenagers self-centered since they're always trying to make themselves look cool or pretty to societies standards and not they're own true intentions. Molly from the freshman class says, "That a lot of teenage girls are self-absorbed today simply because everyone else is so determined to make their hair and makeup look perfect every single day, which in turn makes other girls become obsessed with their own self-image and how they view themselves." Deb and Molly are in tune thinking that society makes girls that they need to be pretty or get a lot of likes to be popular or on top in society. Sadly, it's a never ending cycle that each generation has to deal with but in completely different ways. "Unlike the egocentrism of preschoolers which is based on concrete problems," says Dr. Paul Schwartz ," Adolescent egocentrism concerns more abstract thoughts and ideas." He is saying that teenagers only do what they think is cool based on what everyone else thinks is cool, but might not be what is actually cool. This theory is complex in its own matter confusing the adolescent brain to become so insecure about her flaws that she becomes so self-absorbed to make herself queen bee. This self-absorption therefore causes jealousy of who has the newest item, who goes to the most parties, who has the best grades, or even who has the coolest clique. "Girls are judgmental because they look for the flaws in other girls that they find in themselves. When they judge other girls in reality judging themselves, at least in part," states Molly a freshman at Norton High School. This jealousy causes cliques to fall apart at the seams or make them stronger because they judge everyone including their friends all the time. Judging and gossiping is a "fun" and easy way to pass time when all you can do is tweet something and text all your friends at any time of the day you wish. In return, talking to people too much causes you to become jealous of what they have and not be only happy with what you have in your life. Nancy said, "The only reason people judge other people is because it's cool to hate everything that is thrown at you. I think it's quite cool to find someone who doesn't hammer down on you just because you don't feel the need to know all the gossip and to talk about boys and people’s enemies." Even though it is okay to not like certain things, everyone thinks that it is exceptionally cool to think differently than everyone else, but in thinking differently just like everyone else that’s what makes us the same. “I think girls just put up a fake wall to make themselves seem more outgoing than they actually are so more people will like them. All the girls that post selfie after selfie are just looking for people's approval. It's all about how many likes they get because they constantly need to know what people think. And girls judge each other because they just want to make themselves feel good. Girls have their own hierarchy. The cool girls on top have to judge the girls in the bottom so they stay on top and the girls on the bottom judge the girls on top because they are bitter about being on the bottom. If girls weren't constantly worried about what other people think of them they wouldn't be judgmental or self-centered.” Stated Jacey Anderson. All of these people can come to agree that teenagers are self-absorbed because of what they think that people think about them, they are insecure, and want to be approved in the eyes of the perfect society.

 

Teenagers these days seem to be under the impression that they're lazy, no good, and self-absorbed. Many older generations ridicule our generation for being tech savvy and using social media all day.

 

In return, ‘ "We are getting a lot more calls these days from kids who are really interested in volunteering," said Celine Fortin associate executive director of ARC of New Jersey, an advocacy group for people with developmental disabilities,’ shows that many teenagers do care about having an impact on their community. Even though community service does look good on college applications and is required for certain high schools this is an overwhelming amount of adolescents looking to serve they're community.  This shows that people aren’t constantly caring about themselves, they want to help out people with disabilities or people that are less fortunate. "The only time they're not self centered is when they're playing a sport," Jacob continued," with younger kids, and are escpecially good with special needs children." He said this because he feels as though teenagers want to set a good example for other people but can't maintain their consistency. They want to impress people to show that it's not only about them, and once in a while they can take the time to not be constantly thinking about themselves. "She learned that that it's not so much what teens are thinking — it's how." Stated Richard Knox. (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=124119468) Even though some people may want to blame the parents for how their children's behavior, it's ultimately up to the adolescent. It's how they think about thinking, how they think society sees them, they feel the need to impress people since they are insecure,  it's just a phase that most teenagers go through, the phase of self-absorption.

Knox, Richard. "The Teen Brain: It's Just Not Grown Up Yet." NPR. N.p., 1 Mar. 2010. Web. 10 Jan. 2014.  (MLA Format For npr.org)

 

Self-Deprication

            One day over my summer break, I went to a surprise birthday party for one of my long time friends.  I told my mom that we should leave five minutes late just so I am not the first person there, since my parents are always super early for everything I do. I pulled up her driveway and noticed a suspicious girl chomping on gum as loudly as possible.

 I said, “Hey! Are you here for Ellen’s surprise birthday party?”

All she did was roll her eyes and pop her gum. If only I could pop that gum to get it all stuck in her hair just like her stuck up attitude. People like her are the reason I rarely leave my house.  She stepped in front of me and slowly walked to the front door. I hope this girl knows that since she has gum in her mouth she does not have to walk like she has gum stuck to the bottom of her foot! As she opened the door I was thankful that there were other girls there. 

Ellen was coming to her surprise party in five minutes. We all tried to find a hiding place that she would not be able to see any of us when she walked in.  Of course once we are all hidden the gum chewing girl had to go to the bathroom. As she walked to the bathroom, Ellen walked in. Obviously things were not going according to plan.

The only thing intellectual that the gum chewing girl could think of to say was, “This is definitely not your surprise birthday party!”

Wow, what a genius. I bet Ellen can already tell that it is her surprise birthday party by all of the hanging decorations that say happy birthday.  Even if she had meant it sarcastically, it was not funny, she ruined the surprise factor. I should have known she was no good. I bet that even if she was the last human being on planet earth, I would be gladly living on the polar opposite side of the world.

Once we were done eating pizza, we went to the bonfire out in the front yard. Some of the girls had been acting very suspicious by going downstairs and coming back upstairs? What were they hiding that was so important?  While we talked by the fire there was this girl that looked all worn down. I still do not know her name to this day, but I guess she got her first B+ ever, and complains about getting an A-. Well at least that’s what I heard. That annoys me, seriously be thankful that you are so intellectually smart that getting a 90 makes you want to go crying home to your mommy. It is still an A and you are still on High Honor Roll. Please cry me a river, build a bridge, and get over it.

It was about 10 PM when everyone was getting picked up, and we all decided we needed a group picture. The gum chewer decided that her hair didn't look good so she was going to take a picture. I do not know what was wrong with her, she might have had a sugar rush, but her hands were so shaky the pictures look liked a two year old took it.  I can only pray that she can control her muscles to not shake just for a few seconds to take a semi normal picture. I always need my pictures to be crystal clear and not pixelated. I finally figured out why some people were acting weird, it was because a few girls got chosen to have a sleepover. Good for you, I would not have cared except for the fact that you had to hide it. I would not have cared, but hiding something is suspicious, immature, and annoying. Just tell me straight up and I will not care, I probably have more important things to do than to sit around and prank call your boyfriend at two in the morning.

Summer

I feel like there should not be a summer vacation. Only a handful of people actually spend those three months to the complete fullest. Most people sleep in until noon and do not spend times with people a lot, so much that it can actually be boring. I feel as though every four months there should be a month off so it’s a different season to do different activities. I feel like it does not matter if you are upper class or lower class but if your parents are committed to helping you learn and you want to then you will succeed to your fullest. It is the fact that people have to create all these summer programs to entertain the kids. “… The summer of 2010 is as close to world travel as they’ve ever been,” which means that the people are just making programs so the kids have something to do and do not get into trouble. Also I think people deserve a lot of vacation day because In South Korea they have 545 instructional hours versus America has a whopping 1,080 hours yet South Korea has almost 100 point more difference. (American Sociological Review)  We shouldn’t have a long summer vacation because most people lose knowledge or gain very minimal amount. “Students from disadvantaged backgrounds at the end of grade school score what their more advantaged calssmates did almost two years earlier.” (Socioeconomic status) It does have to do somewhat with the three months away with school but also your environment. If your parents enforce reading and social skills during summer you will be more of a well-rounded person, and a smarter one too.

Holiday

America spends a lot of money on holidays.   In 2010 all of Americans spent roughly 228.36 billion dollars. Christmas is estimated to be about 59.2 % of what people spend on holidays. The most money is spent on clothes and then gift cards. You would think it would be toys since most of the advertising is geared towards little kids. I feel like this is okay to spend this much money. I feel like some people would look at these statistics and think that is excessive. Don’t you love waking up on Christmas morning and having the feeling of surprise of what you get? You would be lying if you said you did not like getting presents. Some people might say that you could buy something for yourself instead of wasting your money on a person. Also you feel greedy just spending money on yourself. Wouldn't you feel better knowing that the person is going to like the gift that you brought for them instead of for yourself? See, that's where we have lost the true meaning of Christmas. We expect so much from people when asking for presents but in reality we should be thankful for our family's health. It may sound corny but all that really matters is family. That's what the holiday spirit is all about so go buy a present or two, but just be grateful that you have this time to spend with your family.

 4/5 Stars

 Taylor Swift’s Red Album was definitely a blockbuster.  Taylor sold 1.21 million copies of her album in just one week which is more than any album since 2002. Red has the second largest sales for any female artist.  Swift’s 16 song album statistically blew me away.

                Before her actual song came out, her song, We Are Never Getting Back Together rocketed the top charts so there was much anticipation for her album.  Red had about the same amount when it came to fast and slow songs. There were nine fast or catchy songs and there were seven slow songs on her album.  The first two were catchy to get the listener hooked and then it basically went every other song was catchy or slow creating a well mixed album.

                There was some meaning behind all of her songs, because “If you’re horrible to me, I’m going to write a song about it and you won’t like it. That’s how I operate,” Taylor said.  All of her songs have to do with the “… intense love, intense frustration, intense jealousy, confusion, all of those in my mind, all of those are red.”  Taylor’s saying that all these songs are about the good and bad that she has experienced in love.  Ironically, Swift’s thirteenth song the Lucky One and thirteen is her lucky number.  What is also ironic is that her last song is “Begin Again.” You could interpret this as start the track all over again and experience it. It could also mean that since the relationship is over you still have to get up and learn to fall in love all over again.

                Lots of people said they like Swift’s new look, going from country to pop. Some people said they miss the real country but mainly everyone still agrees it is amazing.  This is obviously proven that within minutes fourteen arenas were sold out, including Foxboro Massachusetts’ Gillette Stadium.  She got tons of raves with sayings like “An Inc(RED)ible Album!!”  “Beyond flawless, this is fearless.” But on the other hand a few people didn’t like it saying statements like “Not goodL” and “I miss the old Taylor.” Even with this negativity she spent a hard two years working on this album and is Billboard’s youngest female of the year, which is something to be cheerful about

1.      Good Review

By Jon Dolan

October 4, 2013

Way to kill it, Milez. Your VMA performance put the Internet in traction, enraging liberals with its dicey racial burlesque and scandalizing conservatives with its twerking-toward-Bethlehem decadence. You've taken raging-bull control of your sexuality, even if it has often looked like LBJ taking control of our policy in Vietnam. And now you've sealed the deal with the Rihanna-meets-Gaga-meets-Pink-meets-Britney party grenade of a record your special moment merits.

Bangerz is the sound of Hannah Montana gone Miami Vice. "You think I'm strange, bitch?/Shit's bananas like a fuckin' 'rangutan, bitch," she rhymes in a sketchy hip-hop drawl on "Do My Thang." It's strange but it's also traditional: Her Disney-steeped voice never takes a back seat to the wide-ranging production (from the likes of Pharrell, Will.i.am and Dr. Luke), and Billy Ray's daughter rocks a country vocal during several tracks. Some skeptics – let's call them haters – might argue that Cyrus isn't wholly comfortable in her new dirty/crazy persona. But that's part of the strange charm: "We Can't Stop" undercuts wild-child woo-hoo with dark, uneasy sonic textures, and ballad crushers like "Wrecking Ball" ride the hunger and confusion that make great coming-of-age pop. "I just started living," she sings on the starkly beautiful album opener, "Adore You." There's as much terror as power in that realization. That's what makes it.

1.       Average Review

By Jon Dolan

October 16, 2013

Katy Perry's 2010 album, Teenage Dream, was such a massive blockbuster that we've had to wait three years for the follow-up where she reveals the multifaceted artist behind the fun pop sheen. And Prism is as prismatic as all get-out: There's the Blakean feline of "Roar," the trap-rap interlocutor of "Dark Horse" (featuring Juicy J of Three 6 Mafia), the jet-set gal pal of "International Smile." On "Ghost," she lances the boil on her soul that is Russell Brand. On "This Is How We Do," she's a liberated weekday warrior, going from all-night parties with the boys to "Japaneezy" nail appointments to kamikaze Mariah karaoke. It's amazing she was able to cram all this Katy onto one album.

Some of Teenage Dream's sunny effervescence remains intact here ("Time to bring out the big balloons," she promises on the lush disco shwanger "Birthday"). But Perry and her longtime collaborators Dr. Luke and Max Martin often go for a darker, moodier intimacy à la high-end Swedish divas Robyn and Lykke Li. Songs like "Legendary Lovers" and "Unconditionally" set stark revelations to torrential Euro splendor. Perry has always done a great job of letting us know she's in on the joke of pop stardom. Sadly, she doesn't always bring that same sense of humor and self-awareness to the joke of pop-star introspection. The album's raft of ripe-lotus ballads is larded with Alanis-ian poesy she can't pull off: "I thank my sister for keeping my head above the water/When the truth was like swallowing sand," she sings on "By the Grace of God." A California girl should know that there are better things to do at the beach.

1.      Good Review

By Jody Rosen

November 13, 2008

Taylor Swift has defied a lot of conventional wisdom. In the midst of a recording-industry implosion, she sold 3 million physical copies of her 2006 debut. At a time when Nashville is dominated by Stetson-wearing male singers in their 30s and 40s, the 18-year-old emerged as country's newest superstar with a repertoire full of girly songs aimed at teens. She is a blond, blue-eyed, amazonian starlet who — unlike nearly every other person who fits that description — writes her own songs, plays an instrument, answers to no Svengali and doesn't rely on high-priced studio ninjas and trendy producers. Britney she ain't.

With her second album, Swift aims to extend her dominion beyond the country-music-loving red states. Songs like "Fearless" and "The Way I Loved You" are packed with loud, lean guitars and rousing choruses. The only overtly country-ish things about Fearless are Swift's light drawl, the occasional reference to a "one-horse town" and a bit of fiddle and banjo tucked into the mix.

Swift is a songwriting savant with an intuitive gift for verse-chorus-bridge architecture that, in singles like the surging "Fifteen," calls to mind Swedish pop gods Dr. Luke and Max Martin. If she ever tires of stardom, she could retire to Sweden and make a fine living churning out hits for Kelly Clarkson and Katy Perry.Taylor Swift: A History in PhotosFor the foreseeable future, though, she's concentrating on her own quirky teen pop. She sings one vaguely political anthem, the string-swathed "Change," filled with pronouncements about "revolution" and a singsong chorus of "hallelujahs." And then there's "The Best Day," a goody-two-shoes ode to Mom and Dad: "Daddy's smart, and you're the prettiest lady in the whole wide world," Swift croons. But she mostly sticks to her favorite topic — boys, boys, boys — in songs filed neatly under "love-struck" or "pissed off." In the latter category is the infectious "Tell Me Why": "I'm sick and tired of your attitude/I'm feeling like I don't know you."It's hard not to be won over by the guilelessness of Swift's high-school-romance narratives ("She wears short skirts, I wear T-shirts/She's cheer captain, and I'm on the bleachers"), with their starry-eyed lyrics about princesses and ball gowns and kissing in the rain. For Fearless to feel any more like it was literally ripped from a suburban girl's diary, it would have to come with drawings of rainbows and unicorns in the liner notes. The lyric sheet to "Forever & Always" even reveals a hidden message in the form of an acrostic, clearly intended for a young man of Swift's acquaintance: "If you play these games, we're both going to lose."And therein lies the peculiar charm of Taylor Swift. Her music mixes an almost impersonal professionalism — it's so rigorously crafted it sounds like it has been scientifically engineered in a hit factory — with confessions that are squirmingly intimate and true. In "Fifteen," Swift confides, "Abigail gave everything she had to a boy/Who changed his mind/And we both cried." Swift's real-life best friend is a girl called Abigail — the singer's not afraid to name names. It's safe to assume that the titular love object in the lilting "Hey Stephen" is, well, some dude named Stephen that Swift has a crush on. And she has a question for him: "All those other girls, well, they're beautiful but would they write a song for you?”

1.      Average Review

By Caryn Ganz

November 13, 2013

Lady Gaga is at her peak when she's playing the neon queen of all the world's outcasts. And with her constant prodding, her Little Monsters have filled the biggest big tent in modern pop. But in the five years since Stefani Germanotta's arrival, weird has become the currency that overwhelmingly fuels pop culture – from seapunk Tumblrs to American Horror Story. So for Gaga to stay on top in 2013, she has to keep cranking up the cray.

For better and for worse, Artpop meets the mandate. It's a bizarre album of squelchy disco (plus a handful of forays into R&B) that aspires to link gallery culture and radio heaven, preferring concepts to choruses. It's sexual but not sexy, filled with bitchy fashion designers and one-liners like "Uranus/Don't you know my ass is famous?" and "Touch me, touch me, don't be sweet/Love me, love me, please retweet." Gaga wants us to believe the LP was inspired by Marina Abramović, Jeff Koons and Sandro Botticelli; at its best, it sounds like it was creatively directed by RuPaul, Dr. Ruth, and Beavis and Butt-Head.

Artpop opens with four tracks of thumping futuresex/lovesounds where Gaga vows to lay her intentions, and body, naked. She cops a drag queen's arch humor on intergalactic journey "Venus," examines sex and power on gothy grinder "G.U.Y" (which stands for "girl under you"), and woos a lover whose "boyfriend was away this weekend" on the slinky "Sexxx Dreams." Yes, we can read her poker face.

But just as Artpop gets into a groove of high-tech Pop&B, her creative impulses splinter. She plays hook girl for Too $hort, Twista and T.I.'s thugged-up, self-parodic "Jewels N' Drugs" and falls for her own cutesy wordplay on the glammy "MANiCURE." The Rick Rubin-produced "Dope" is a turgid ballad about the slippery slopes of romance and drugs that lunges for Elton John and crash-lands near Meat Loaf.

Gaga's previous albums – 2008's electro-pop romp The Fame and its brilliant follow-up EP, The Fame Monster, and 2011's inventively nostalgic Born This Way – were largely the result of partnerships with producers RedOne and Fernando Garibay. Paul "DJ White Shadow" Blair worked on most of Artpop, but there's a pile-up of names in the credits including Zedd, Madeon, David Guetta, Infected Mushroom and Will.i.am. In the past two years, Gaga has split from her longtime stylist/choreographer and manager and canceled a world tour to recover from a serious hip injury. Could Artpop simply be a distraction obscuring the drama behind the curtain?Ironically, Gaga redeems the LP with a pair of tracks that strip away the artifice in favor of plain sentiment: "Do What U Want," a spectacularly growly and groovy R. Kelly duet, and "Gypsy," an Eighties-style anthem where Gaga admits her love of performing and love of love often clash. "I don't want to be alone forever, but I love gypsy life," she sings without abandon. Neither track is subtle, but they work because they weren't born from the chilly conceit that art and pop need an arranged marriage to get busy.

1.      Unfavorable Review

This is going to be the worst review in the world. I would think differently, but there is no way that a review of a backup dancers rap album can tell you anything you don't already know about this album, the creator of it, or the reason why he is in a position to have made it. Just to rehash, lets go over the basic facts:

1. Kevin Federline is a backup dancer who has danced for Britney Spears, Justin Timberlake, and others.

2. Mr. Federline has since dated, impregnated twice, and married Ms. Spears which has boosted him from a nobody to being the self proclaimed "America's Most Hated" (It was 8 days after the release of this that Britney decided to divorce him, maybe she listened to the whole thing)

3. Playing With Fire is his debut, and hopefully his final album which contains lame beats, worse lyrics, and at the end you'll realize the 50 minutes you just spent listening to this garbage will never be replaced.

Ouch, a little rough? Maybe he should be given a break, No, there is no break for someone who has not only the audacity for thinking he has the right to record this and release it for people to pay for it, but hearing the name "Federline Records" and realizing that was the label to spring these songs free really does make them worse. It all begins with looking at the cover really, it shows Kevin seemingly in control but still managing to look like a poor man's Justin Timberlake. Of course the picture could be taken before he realized how much this album would really sell, and how many people would be attending his concerts. Let's take a look, debuting at #151 on the Billboard charts selling 6,000 copies its first week and playing to as few as 300 people would be a new band's dream, but coming from someone who made a song with tie title "The World Is Mine" seems a little lacking. The weak album and ticket sales could be a sign that people don't buy this, and especially wouldn't buy the album. Good for them.

Usually for my reviews I cover about 3-4 songs, but since this is so god awful, I will not listen to this just to say how much 3 or 4 songs sucked, that's right Sputnik, you're getting half of it, because honestly it can cover for the entire album, trust me.

With all his faults, at least Federlne knows that an album begins with an Intro and so here we go. It begins oddly enough, with the clamoring of children, what are they crying for? To hear a story from a character known as "grandpa". The voices lap over each other until the unite with a "Grandpa, can you tell us a story when you were young?". This gets responded with a chuckle, yes the grandfather is none other than Mr. Federline, finding more and more ways to annoy people buy taking on more false roles everyday. The second half of this introduction is a bit of relief, we have to hear "Kevin Federline" being repeated by the many media broadcasts this recording was made from, each speaking of Kevin's questionable abilities to be a father, husband, and rapper. At least we don't have to hear him talk about himself anymore, we can save that for the rest of the entire album. Meaningless noises end this short beginning, and we are lead from the pointless and dull to the...rest of K-Fed's album (there is no other worse phrase I could come up with).

Light electronic textures begin The World Is Mine, a piece which gets the message across that everything "belong to [him]/every cranny and nook/every rock every bird/every animal in it". Not one to humble himself, Federline spits similar sounding ramble for the remaining 3 minutes on top of a looping drum beat being backed up by a steel drum sample. Nearing the end of the song, the drum tempo picks up and so do the repeating keys, leading us out of room 2 and into room 3 or "Kevin Federline's House of Horror" (not official title of album). While we're on the subject of that steel drum sample, how much of a coincidence is it that Paris Hilton received the same treatment for her single? Maybe they should have children, and maybe these children should make records (or make a career out of being looked at, just like their parents).

Alright so we have established that Kevin owns everything and everyone, how many more messages do we have to ear or things do we have to learn? America's Most Hated begins with a sound Federline is surely familiar with, police sirens. Now we're sure to hear more fake beats being looped ri-...wait what's this? Piano? a sign of changes to the tender and real sign of this misunderstood MC perhaps? "Waitress, can I have another drink please? I'd like to formally introduce myself..." and so begins our regularly scheduled Kevin Federline number with those fake beats dropping down and being the backdrop to Kevin's weak rapping. Right there is one of his main problems, besides being Kevin Federline, the main problem with the music is his delivery. One for being subject to being called slow and not keeping up with the slowest of beats while still calling this stuff rap, K-Fed shows clear signs he lacks the fire to be a proper MC. Of course maybe fast beats and hard licks aren't his thing, maybe resorting to "I'm Kevin Federline, America's Most Hated" as a chorus is his only resort to being noteworthy besides his (ex)wife. Bad lyrics do not even begin to describe this song, laughable is a better term for it. "...but it's OK, I got somethin' for ya/handin' out ass kickings like diplomas..." lines such as that really make you wonder if this was recorded with the intention of real people hearing it and not getting an unintentional humor kick out of it. Since this is being examined under the idea that this is actually real and not a joke track, it fares not well.

Sounding more like an actual rap single and less like mindless boasting is Snap, which puts the disguise of being a legitimate song about snapping and its ability to relate to everyone who isn't K-Fed alive, until about 30 seconds into it when the man finds another reason to refer to himself. "I don;t say shit I just snap fingers/Kev Federline and I pull better dimes/cause Benjamin Franklin is a good friend of mine". What is noteworthy and different than the rest of the the work thus far is that the dull drum beats have been replaced by a dull electronic pulse which eventually drops off to let us hear the lyrics. 4 tracks down and so far sounding hopelessly uninspired and self absorbed, maybe the single will do better.

And so we march on to the single, Lost Control, which was considered good enough to ring K-Fed to the Kid's Choice Awards and play it for them. What begin with a promising alive real piano melody and the thought that maybe he has hit his stride, our hopes to salvage something is dashed when the bombastic and moronic line of "This is that hip hop flavor/mixed with a little bit of rock and roll" is spoken, in complete seriousness. Just as it was being made to be heard exclusively and to be a false preview of thePlaying with Fire, the mainstream would take kind to this and buy into the entire thing due to the actually not bad piano that comes in following each verse, but when some of these lines really are Don't Hate cause I'm a superstar/And I married a superstar/and no one will come between us no matter who you are", it really makes you wonder what the success of this track would be if it were reduced to an instrumental.

Guest spots are about to flood the work, and it begins with Dance With a Pimp featuring Ya Boy and really it just starts to sound like the same message being conveyed in slightly different manners. "K-Fed I'm the pimp of all pimps/the mack of all macks... and so continue the "lyrics" (which will henceforth be known as "drivel") with the ongoing theme of self promotion. Remaining the highlight of the album, the beats are the only thing incurring any change, and while they do not go up in quality, the rather shift over sideways to signify change, but not progression. Change and not progression might as well be the real theme of this work, as not only would it replace the existing theme of "Kevin Federline", it would be more honest to its listeners, and not require them to listen to it to figure it out.

Minor drugs, privilege, peoples time. So many things are abused in one swift strike it gives K-Fed some sort of thing to be proud of. While each song was not covered, you can get the idea from half of it, and everything you need to appreciate this is there. Want bad lyrics? try every song on this album. Want a vocal highlight? Gotta give it to Britney's appearance on the album, saying "crazy" is just enough to win it. Good beats? Try Lose Myself which obviously was paid the most attention to in the making of this album. The biggest and best song on here is Intro which gets that title for being under a minute, and not being every other song on here.

1.      Unfavorable Reviews

2.      It’s telling that the lyrics to two of the seven tracks on Old Man Wizard‘s Unfavorable debut LP talk about telling stories. In both “If Only” and “The Bearded Fool,” there’s a drive toward narrative, and as the majority of the songs included on the California progressive trio’s self-released first outing are ultimately character studies — from “Highwayman,” to “Nightmare Rider,” “The Bearded Fool” and “Traveller’s Lament” — with guitarist/vocalist/songwriter Francis Charles Roberts assuming the various characters in first-person (“Nightmare Rider” is in third), Old Man Wizard seem like a band destined to write at some point in their tenure a full story arc concept album. They haven’t done that with Unfavorable, but they’re not far off, and Roberts, who doubles as Ruba Jouba in pirate metal outfit The Dread Crew of Oddwood, comes by his theatricality honestly. Fortunately for anyone who’d taken on listening to Unfavorable — and this isn’t always the case – Old Man Wizard have the accomplished songwriting and progressive theory behind what they’re doing to back up that theatrical sensibility. Both bassist Andre Beller and drummer Kris Calabio contribute vocals alongside Roberts, and Minni Jo Mazzola, who also adds flute to “Traveller’s Lament,” makes periodic singing appearances, so it is a vocal-heavy album, but it’s with the distinctive harmonies and creative arrangements that Unfavorable sets its mood and forms its cohesive layers of aesthetic. Front to back, the album winds up gorgeous, accomplished, varied and well beyond the common expectation of a fumbling debut from a band feeling their way into a songwriting methodology. Old Man Wizard — and Roberts as the principle architect of their output on this LP — seem to have a firm grasp on what they want the band to be and how they want to realize that vision. Drawing influences from traditional and progressive metal — clean vocal Opeth are a big influence in both the vocal style and overarching melancholy of a song like “If Only” — and playfully marrying them with garage and other heavy rocks, Old Man Wizard showcase marked potential and stylistic nuance that seems beyond their still-nascent tenure, having only come together in 2012.

3.      Both the music and lyrics of “Highwayman” feed into a sense of motion, and Roberts immediately assumes charge of the album as its narrator. It’s an initial rush, a quick gallop to get lost in that finds a mirror later with the push of side B’s bass-heavy opener, “The Bearded Fool.” Also working in “Highwayman”‘s favor, however, is its hook, which comes paired with jumpy transitions and a smooth running verse, the backing vocals in the chorus foreshadowing a nod to Ennio Morricone that comes to the fore with cello from Beller and harmonica from Roberts at the culmination. Already, Old Man Wizard have proven their ability to cull cohesive results from unlikely combinations of influence, and Unfavorable only gets more complex as the acoustic folk of “If Only” pulls off an easy sway and more Opethian harmonies. Electric guitar is gradually layered into the background, giving a sense of build to the song, but the peaceful, wistful air is maintained throughout, even as “If Only” comes as close to threatening as it gets with a volume swell at the 4:30 mark. Rather than take off into a heavier thrust, Old Man Wizard serve the song better by staying patient, knowing that everything has a place in the course of the album, and drop back to the sweet vocal melody and psychedelic folk acoustic guitar. If there’s a single arrangement on Unfavorable that demonstrates the band’s prog mindset, it might be this one, but “If Only” still works best in the context of the release overall, leading into the shortest track, “Nightmare Rider” (3:23), on which lyrics arrive in jabs and the guitars and bass go headfirst into a grungier riffing that’s hammered out somewhat by the production but still the dirtiest-sounding thing they’ve played yet on the record. Of course, the atmosphere is maintained, and one gets a Danny Elfman-esque vibe filtered through proto-metallic crunch and classic thrash as the shouts at the start of each verse line calling to mind Metallica‘s “The Four Horsemen,” seemingly with intent.